I've had a lot on my mind the last few days, but after much thought, careful consideration and prayerful reflection I've reached a decision that I'm comfortable with. And it all comes down to loyalty. You see last week there was a job posting for a year-round, full-time camp director within what I consider to be my "comfort zone" (I'm willing to relocate for a job, but I'm not interested in moving across the country. Sounds great right? The catch is that the position is with a very similar camp...so similar in fact some may consider it competition.
Based on the job description, what I know about their programs, my experience and a few other facts I knew I had a pretty good shot at getting the job. My director even made a point to make sure I knew about the posting, which I appreciated considering she's spent the last few months working her way through piles of paperwork to create a year round AD job and secure funding. At first it was a no brainer, I couldn't not let this pass me by. Then I started thinking.
About the amazing campers I get to meet and learn from all summer long.
About the life long friendships I've made with other staff members.
About stargazing on August nights and counting shooting stars.
About all of the blood, sweat and tears that I have poured into that place.
And I realized.
This isn't a place I am willing to walk away from
I poured everything I had into my old camp and if God hadn't of firmly closed that door I would have kept going. I've held back on pouring myself in my current camp because I was scared of putting in all that work, only to lose it all. But that's slowly changing, and I didn't realize just how far I'd come until I was faced with the very real option of leaving. And I'm not ready to leave. I haven't accomplished everything I've wanted to accomplish where I am, there's still unfinished projects and maybe even projects I haven't started.
I will continue to be patient while funding is in the approval stages.
I will be devoted to making things better.
I will continue to strengthen my bonds with campers and staff.
I will keep volunteering my time, working long hours and trusting this is where I am
supposed need to be.
I will pour myself into this place.
Because I've finally figured out exactly what my loyalties are.